Insecurities

Insecurities. We all have them.

The monster in us…it feeds on it.

It tells you things. It whispers to your soul, this you should do, this you shouldn’t do, and soon enough, you'll start to care, because all that you’ll know is how you want to get rid of your insecurities. You won’t believe anything it said, you’ll ignore it…until you realize, that the monster don’t just exist inside of your head.

They’re everywhere.

The people who called you ugly and the people who called you names. The people who cursed at you and the ones who told you that you were worthless.

Pathetic.

Weird.

That you were a nobody.

You smiled at them...laughed, as if it was all just a joke. But what do they know about the broken heart beneath your face?

                                          

The monster inside of your head would tell you to listen to them.

 They called you fat…stop eating.

They called you ugly…wear more make-up. 

They called you weird…try to fit in.

But it’s not that easy. You want to push yourself to the limit, and to that monster, there is no limit.

You'll stop eating for hours…and hours soon turns to days…days turns to weeks…

           

You’ll wear a touch of lipstick…and then starve yourself…and beg for validity…

You’ll listen to music on the radio… wear designer brands…and laugh at the cruel jokes they make. 

You’d get what you want…but you won’t get what you need.

Your stomach will cry out in pain, begging to be filled with food.

Your face will be irritated with red, begging to be stripped off of chemicals.

Your body won’t want to show off your visible ribs…they want to be hidden.

But no, you want to be skinny, and beautiful, and you want to be one of them.

You want to be a part of society.

But you didn’t need to.

You never had to listen to the monsters inside of your head.

You never had to listen to the monsters in society.

You don’t have to be a part of "them" at all.

You’re not them...you’re you.

Why should you listen to them?

Did you even believe in them when they said you’re pathetic?

Worthless?

Weird?

That you’re a nobody?

Because they were wrong.